Home buying can be a stressful process, but when you throw two different opinions in the mix, it can be downright agonizing. Maybe you’re dying for a cute home in the suburbs, but your loved one loves the idea of being in a high-rise right in the center of the bustling city. These disagreements can create roadblocks on your way to arriving at the perfect home.

With low inventory and rising home values in popular housing markets, you have to act quickly when you find your dream home. Don’t let a stalemate with your significant other cause you to miss out. Check out these tips to help you get on the same page as your honey and keep your house hunt from turning into World War III.

Make Separate Must-Have Lists

Your best shot at a compromise is to find out what you and your significant other have in common. When our real estate agents work with couples, we suggest that each person list out their top 10 must-have features along with their top 10 wishes.

Pro Tip: “I like [for couples] to make these lists separately, independently of each other, and then if they don’t have at least five matching things on the must list, I make them go to 20,” says Gunn. “Just so we can find five common things that are really important to both of them.” 

Start crafting your own list, and have your spouse do the same. Compare the lists and identify a handful of home features (location, number of rooms, size of backyard) that are important to both of you. These agreed-upon features will serve as the foundation to your home-buying discussion. When you and your significant other start the home search on common ground, you’ll be more likely to compromise later down the road.

Take Your Emotion Out of the Budget

House-hunting couples most often disagree on how much money they should spend on a home. Should you take on a higher mortgage to get your forever home? Or should you go the conservative route and get slightly smaller digs? 

Do your best to take emotions out of the equation and look at the facts. It is advised that your monthly payments should be no more than 32% of your take-home pay. Veto any home that doesn’t fall within that price range. Don’t get caught up imagining holidays and family gatherings in a huge, extravagant kitchen. A forever home won’t be yours forever if it’s out of your price range.

By removing your emotions from the decision, you’ll be able to choose a home you BOTH will enjoy (and still have!) years from now.

Be Willing to Postpone the House Hunt

If you and your significant other are butting heads, take a step back from the conversation. There will always be new homes for sale, but digging in your heels over a home-purchase disagreement will only create a divide between you and your significant other.  Most often advise couples who are having trouble finding common ground to take a short break from the discussion then reconvene. “I do believe their [relationship] is more important than a house. I would rather them get on the same page than it be a really rocky situation,” she says.

A home isn’t worth straining your relationship. Compromise is key to finding something that will fit both of your needs. 

So if you and your spouse can’t agree on a home, take a breather. Make a pact that you will not discuss locations, square footage, price and so on for at least a couple of weeks. Then come back to the discussion with a fresh perspective and outlook.

Let Your Real Estate Agent Be Your Mediator

A quality real estate agent can listen to your housing disputes and help bridge the gap between you and your spouse. With their intimate knowledge of the market, an experienced agent can provide sound, unbiased advice.

Don’t let a stressful situation like buying a home cause strife with your spouse. A real estate pro can help you find a place you both love. 

Source: Dave Ramsey Blog